This is avoidance, sometimes because the conditioning of an earlier chapter is still too loud and partly because navigating guilt, shame and social belonging is genuinely hard. That is worth examining. Start by anchoring yourself in the present. Look at the actual numbers: what you earn, what you owe and what your commitments look like. Those are the facts. Then come your values: what matters to you, what you genuinely enjoy and what feels worthwhile. Needs provide security. Wants bring pleasure and variety. Desires give us something to aspire towards. The goal is not to live in desires. It is to move consciously between all three levels, depending on what the moment calls for, without the guilt circuitry hijacking the decision every time. Enjoying what you have is not the opposite of financial responsibility. It is what financial responsibility was supposed to make possible. Explore more of her work at www.priamasson.com @coachingwithpria bahrainthismonth.com | NOVEMBER 2026 COMMERCE 110 Mindful Money Matters A few days ago, we were out at a mall and I saw something I really liked. I picked it up, looked at it and then put it back. My daughter asked me why I wasn’t buying it. My response was simple: “I don’t need it.” But her response stopped me in my tracks. She said: “You can’t always get only what you need; sometimes you can get what you want too.” She is a wise one and the inspiration for this piece. Maslow’s Hierarchy of Needs Let’s start with Maslow’s hierarchy of needs. He described motivation as moving from basic survival and safety through belonging and esteem to self-actualisation. Needs, wants and desires are not quite Maslow’s hierarchy, but the parallel holds. Needs form the foundation of our financial lives. Wants bring comfort, pleasure and variety. Desires connect to our aspirations, identity and the life we would like to experience. Many of us grew up in one part of that pyramid and have earned our way to another. But our relationship with money may not have caught up. Those old rules are still running in the background and that can create a quiet but persistent conflict. Pria Masson combines over 20 years in finance with a master’s degree in Psychology and Neuroscience of Mental Health from King’s College London. She writes about money, mindset and the patterns that shape financial wellbeing. When Your Money Has Moved On but Your Mind Has Not What Happens in the Brain Your thinking brain knows you can afford that bag, pair of shoes or holiday, yet something about spending still feels uncomfortable. Part of the explanation is the brain’s conflict monitor, which fires when behaviour does not match our internalised values. Buying something simply because you want it registers as a conflict, even when the numbers say otherwise. And this is where guilt and shame enter. Guilt says: “I did something wrong.” Shame says: “There is something wrong with me.” They are not the same. Guilt may come from feeling wasteful, while shame runs deeper. It is more visceral, more closely tied to our identity and more connected to how we believe others see us. There is also ‘fear of positive evaluation’, the discomfort of being seen to do well, have things and enjoy life. It can activate the brain’s threat system just as a threat would. When guilt consistently suppresses dopamine, the capacity for genuine enjoyment begins to dull. What It Means in Practice A financially comfortable person who permits themselves to live only in the needs register is not being responsible.
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